Saturday, March 5, 2011

Something to Believe In

Ahh, the wonders of blogging. Blogging lets you set down your thoughts and communicate in sometimes meaningful ways with a wide host of other would be philosophers until you begin to realize that the art of thoughtful composition is often time consuming and generally inconvenient. I wonder how many blogs lay orphaned in cyber-space that need your very love and attention...blogs that could be maintained for free even...much, much, less than that late night charity's suggestion of just pennies a day and the use of decidedly sorrrowful pictures of caged animals or the haunting sounds of Sarah McLachlan.

As usual, I've tried to start this entry with the title of a contemporary song relevant in some way to the general theme of the post and the title of this one refers to the good 'ol Brett Michaels Poison tune and not the new fangled song by Parachute that dominates a current google search. The rest of this post is, in actuality, a reflection paper written for one of my Graduate courses in which we were required to visit a religious service of a faith "as far away from yours" as convenient. I elected for some local Buddhist action, as I am not willing to go somewhere that I know would REALLY scare me and have always been curious about Buddhism in general. So a thank you goes out to Sean for reminding me I even have this wonderful blog and here is something for you all to meditate on. HA! Get it! See what I did there?

There is an old joke that goes something like this: “If you ever want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.” I do not know who to credit with the insight that went into that piece of humor, but it sums up my semester pretty well. Nothing has gone just like I planned it, especially when it came to this project. Another of my classes had planned a field trip to the Hindu Temple of Helotes and I thought it would provide a wonderful opportunity for me to double dip scholastically, fulfilling both the requirement for that class and giving me the opportunity to get this assignment done in one tidy little trip. Additionally, the trip would be filled with “safety”…a comfortable group of fellow students and a tour guide knowledgeable in both the religious tenants we would be observing and of our total ignorance thereof. As it turned out, however, the trip was postponed at the last minute and I had to scramble to find another opportunity to grow that would require me to step out of my comfort zone. I hopped on-line and was able to find a local Buddhist meditation center that was holding an open house, The Shambhala Meditation Center. I embarked on the trip not knowing what to expect and without the safety net of my classmates and tour-guide. Equipped only with the sense of disequilibrium and curiosity I was probably supposed to go with as envisioned as part of the assignment, I set forth for a night of adventure. I am glad I did.

I was one of the first people to arrive at the modest building on S. St. Mary’s and remember thinking as I approached it didn’t look like much. It could easily have been the office of a local dentist or real estate agent, but it certainly was not what I envisioned as a shrine, temple, or church. There was no grandiosity I have come to normally come to associate with a spiritual place. As I entered, I was surprised that the people that welcomed me were all female and all white. As a Catholic, I’m used to a male priest being the one to normally give me any kind of religious instruction, at least on any given Sunday. The situation did not quite fit my unfair presumption of an overly Asian experience either, as I had come to associate my understanding of Buddhism primarily with Indian, Vietnamese, Thai, and Chinese cultures. I was certainly greeted warmly, and I wasn’t there more than a few minutes when another classmate from this class arrived, and then another. In fact, it was a night of college students as the number soon grew to thirty –five or so people with as many as twenty-eight from various colleges and universities in the area. We briefly introduced ourselves and described what brought us together that night, whether it was individual curiosity or an assignment for class, etc., and then we were all gathered for an introductory lesson on meditation.

As we were about to begin, our leader gave us a brief history of the center and its basic tenants. We discussed the value of meditation and that this particular center was dedicated to “help people of all traditions discover their inherent sanity, gentleness and humor” and a “warriorship” path about being fully present in the moment. The lesson began and we focused on posture and breathing, being aware of our own body, and the thoughts and distractions that came to mind as we did. We were instructed to try and focus on our breathing and when random thoughts or distractions came into our minds not dismiss them outright or try not to think, but rather focus more intently on the task of breathing. At first I found it physically uncomfortable, but over the time I was there that discomfort changed into a greater sense of relaxation as I felt my mind and body settle. We engaged in both sitting and walking meditation and I was shocked to find that we had been at it for almost an hour. My mind had been so focused on the meditation that I could not say I noticed the passage of time at all. When meditation was over, we all returned to the reception area and were offered tea and cookies with our hosts who welcomed any and all questions.

I enjoyed myself and the opportunity to experience a different method of accessing my sense of spirituality. Our hosts were very gracious and were very clear that “meditation belongs to everyone” and that “Buddhists do not own meditation.” It was offered that many local religious leaders of various faiths had visited the center to use meditation to enhance their own spirituality and lives of prayer. Honestly, I thought there would be more I would find “alien” or “strange” but there wasn’t. I understand that the night focused on meditation and said very little about the fullness of Buddhism of this or any particular type, so it was easy for my mind to see it as just another way to pray, and a welcome one at that.

As a Catholic, I have been taught to see life through a Catholic lens. As an adult I have embraced it and have often told friends when we have had conversations about faith that even if some day it were revealed to me that everything I believed had been a lie, I would not regret living my life by its tenants. I have found in them a method of behavior that has brought me peace and happiness with a minimal amount of sacrifice. All I have been called to give up has been a life I have seen destroy others, and I believe that it not for my faith and the grace of God that could easily have been me. I have been told by others my entire life, and possibly the most by those in higher education (in my History classes, not my multicultural ones) that my faith and my tradition has been used to dominate, subjugate, oppress, and restrain individual liberties with very little emphasis on the sociological value of the moral, ethical, and spiritual system of belief and the centuries of charity and social justice the church has tried to provide or incite. I also know that there are plenty of circumstances throughout history in which their claims have been true. I know that there are plenty of Catholics who believe and have been taught that they are to believe that they alone have the keys to the Kingdom of Heaven. However, the Church I grew up in said that these are the things we are to try to do, and this is the way we are to try and live. I was told that, as human beings, we will fail, but we must continue to get back up. I was told we were to share our belief with all who would listen, but I was also told that in the final analysis, the judgment of the final repose of anyone’s soul is not for me to make. I think that is the part that most people down here forget. I believe in God, and I believe in the Church, but I also believe that the Church is a human institution, trying it’s best to engage in ministry to, with, for, and by, other human beings. I think all human institutions have the potential to be hegemonic forces if allowed to be, and it is the responsibility of the people involved in those institutions to monitor and correct them whenever and however they can. Perhaps I am not the most orthodox Catholic, but I have yet to be ex-communicated and I have yet to find another faith that seems to resonate so profoundly within me.

This experience gave me a point of reference in which I can now engage in dialogue with my Buddhist brothers and sisters to help foster mutual understanding. I really enjoyed the writing by Nadira K. Charaniya and Jane West Walsh (2000) and their use of the quote by D. Eck that said “We not only need to understand one another, we need one another to understand ourselves.” I have always felt like an understanding of another faith helped me to shape and refine what I believe, and for the most part has always led me back “home” with a new sense of appreciation for both my faith and theirs. I also know that my faith is constantly refreshed by documents like Verbum Domini: Post-Synodal Apostolic Exhortation on the Word of God in the Life and Mission of the Church (2010) in which Pope Benedict writes:

“Nowadays the quickened pace of globalization makes it possible for people of different cultures and religions to be in closer contact. This represents a providential opportunity for demonstrating how authentic religiosity can foster relationships of universal fraternity. Today, in our frequently secularized societies, it is very important that the religions be capable of fostering a mentality that sees Almighty God as the foundation of all good, the inexhaustible source of the moral life, and the bulwark of a profound sense of universal brotherhood.”

In this life, I continue to try and make the world a little better than I found it and will continue to do so until I can look God in the face and get the real story on everything I either couldn’t figure out or got entirely wrong down here. I fully expect when I get there to hear him ask, “So…got any more jokes?”

References
Benedict XVI. Apostolic Exhortations. Verbum Domini: Post-Synodal Apostolic Exhortation on the Word of God in the Life and Mission of the Church (September 30, 2010).

Walsh, J. W., and Charaniya, N. K. “Interpreting the Experiences of Muslims, Christians,and Jews Engaged in Interreligious Dialogue: A Collaborative Research Study.” Paper presented at the annual conference of the Association of Professors and Researchers of Religious Education, Atlanta, Georgia, November 2000.